Great story

ok so I take pretty big shits... like mosterous shits. this was the first time i had been to my girlfriends house and i was to the point where the turtle head started to inch it's way out. Brown snake was playing peek a boo with my butt hole.
I just had to let this one out or i was gunna obliterate my pants with shit.
"Baby, do you have a bathroom?"
"uhm yeah, why?"
"well uhh my contact is drying up. ill be right back"

I lock the door and sit on the toilet. trying to be as quiet as possible. fuck, i let out the longest, loudest, nastiest shit snake ever... toilet wont flush... i flushed again.... wont flush.... DAMMIT!

how embarassing would it be, if the girl you just started dating found a big shit rod road blocking her bathroom? pretty fuckin embarrassing if you ask me.

So to my manly instinct i think of a way to dispose of it. Well, you see, i was pretty desperate to get rid of this thing. My hand instinctivally, reaches in the toilet water, grasping the big piece of shit. Gagging all over the dam place, i slowly walk the heap of turd soup over to the bathtub. PLOP. dropped it all in the bathtub...BAD IDEA

"why the hell did i put it in the bathtub?" im wondering to myself. so to make matters worse i begin to shove the shit down the shower drain. EVAN WORSE IDEA! i just clogged the shower drain with shit? thats worse then clogging the damn toilet!


i walk back into her bedroom and sit down:
"you were in there for a while."
"yeahh my contacts really bug me. sorry"
"mhm do you wanna go do something later? kelly called and said a few people were going to the mall."
"yeah that sounds good"
(i was really glad she said this because it would get us out of her house so i could play off the shower shit drain until later.)
"ok im gunna go get a quik shower.."
FUCK FUCK FUCK
I began to panic. This beautiful girl was about find her shower clogged with MY shit! i had to get out of there:
"i cant go tonight. i have to go home. sorry"
"its okay. i guess ill just go with kelly."

I sat at home for 45 minutes worried fuckless what was going to happen... my phone begins to ring... shit...
"h-hello?"
"WHAT THE FUCK!"
"please dont be mad!"
"I CANT BELIEVE THIS!"
"it was an..."
"MY LITTLE BROTHER SHIT IN MY SHOWER!"

Owner C wrote:LOL AT THE END LMFAO